As a follow-up to my previous post (“Why Is It Good to Be a Woman?”), I’d like to share a few thoughts on why it’s worth being a man and what it is that makes men special to women. Men might have a different view on this, but that is for them to write about. I’ve formed my opinion based on several men whom I consider authentic and admirable, based on what captivated me about them and sparked my admiration for them.

Women tend to think that they’re the only ones who get hurt in life. That’s a unique perspective. Men are just as vulnerable. Most of the emotional wounds are built into their consciousness by their mothers and fathers during childhood, and the majority of these are profoundly significant and accompany them throughout their entire lives. It’s just that men don’t talk about it; they keep it hidden inside because that’s how they’ve been socialized. They’ve seen from other men that they must hide their vulnerability because it makes them seem weak. I think this is something worth changing.

Men, too, need to find their own inner essence, their center, because that is the source of their stability. Without it, they face a life of drifting, aimlessness, and hopelessness. This takes time, and as they search for their path, they’ll face countless disappointments and setbacks—from which they must be able to pick themselves up and move forward unwaveringly. Women expect men to be “ready,” even though becoming a man (just like becoming a woman) is a long process. I tell every woman: don’t look for a “finished” man, because you won’t find one (except perhaps among men 20–30 years older), but rather, help each other grow into fully realized men and women within your relationship!

With that said - and without claiming to be exhaustive -, let’s look at why it’s good to be a man.

1. For the ability to see the essence of things. When a man can summarize his girlfriend’s (or wife’s) entire day’s mental gymnastics in two sentences, suggesting a solution—without judgment, but imbued with love.
2. For his understanding of how things are connected. There are certain aptitudes in which men are genetically better. Whether it’s physical strength, technical ability, or the ability to grasp a situation or a field. This doesn’t mean a woman can’t develop such abilities, but it would take her longer, and it’s not really worth the effort if there’s someone by her side who already possesses them naturally. These are the kinds of situations where a woman has been struggling for days to solve a problem, trying every trick, and then a man comes along and gets it done in two minutes.
3. For his ability to provide stability and support. A woman is emotionally unstable—even if she hides it and appears stable. The reason for this lies in her physical and psychological makeup and her role in life. It’s not just that she’s emotionally wounded and hasn’t worked through it yet, but that she finds herself in situations where she needs support. By nature, she is more sensitive and vulnerable, both physically and emotionally. Experienced men know that menstruation, menopause, childbirth, and raising children at home make a woman particularly vulnerable, and it is very inappropriate to take advantage of this. At such times, the man is the support, the foundation; and if he cannot be that, the relationship collapses because it cannot be built upon.
4. For the ability to chart a course, set a goal, and achieve it—in other words, for creative ability. Existence must be given meaning, and processes must be given direction. We need a system of principles along which our lives proceed. If a man has a life purpose and principles that he stands by, commits to carrying through to the end, and can convince a woman of their significance, then he will always find a female partner who will support him in this. "Persuasion" through words or forceful actions never achieves its goal; in such cases, the woman offers formal support but remains separated. If, instead, the man persistently creates his own goals, successfully sets them, and brings them to fruition in the world, then the tangible results will convince the woman that the direction is the right one. It is not enough for the woman to simply understand the principle; she must be convinced that the man is capable of bringing it into being in the world—not just in his mind—and, last but not least, she must be certain that what the man creates will be good for her and their children!
5. For the experience of unity with the woman and with a community, and for the result of that. For a man, there is no experience comparable to that of being fully embraced and accepted by a woman (physically, emotionally, and spiritually). It is like fulfillment. For that is what it is: complementarity, becoming whole, unity. If a man were to try to force acceptance upon her, the experience of fulfillment would be lost. Achieving this is possible only through love, commitment, and perseverance. The same applies to larger, creative communities. The result of achieving unity—the pinnacle of fulfillment—is the family or group created through shared creation, which carries forward the process initiated by the man.

God’s male aspect (Purusa) creates for the sake of the female aspect (Prakriti). The Creator exists within Himself; He has no need for a created world. The sole purpose of Creation, on a universal scale, is the expression of love for the female quality. Creation comes into being for the sake of the female quality, as a gift intended for her, so that she may feel at ease within it and raise her offspring to the level of God-consciousness. Worldly creation has the same purpose and meaning. If it is not supported by women, if it does not serve the reproduction of offspring at a higher level, then it will fade away and be destroyed. Men (and women as well) can create for themselves, but over time, no one will care about it, and no one will value or make use of it.

Our present world is full of superfluous things created by men and women for their own sake, things that do not serve the advancement of humanity. This is the primary cause of environmental pollution, the destruction of the Earth, the extinction of species, the drastic decline in population in “overcivilized” areas, and yes, this will also be the primary cause of the destruction of human civilization! Women do not support increasing GDP or gaining territory through war, but rather sustainable development and the peaceful cooperation of cultures.

Margaret Rhasoda Varga
guru of UCCM
Budapest, Hungary